Rob ‘the tash’

This is more terrifying than any of us could imagine.
If you need a set of flash cards giving advice on how to avoid ‘going native’ let our safety division know (Bruce is his name - keepingyousafe@talkingbirds.co.uk - he claims to have been in the SAS, and was once a driver for John Simpson).
Hear from you when you surface.

Ed - holding-the-front-page

Editor,

You may think I might have forgotten to attach my evidence after a night of hard liquor. I asure you this is not the case.

The evidence is attached here, I shall take precautions in future as it is obvious that my previous “mousetash” disguise has been compromised.

I think I have uncovered a new lead, I have a rendezvous at an unnamed location, I can not say where or when as it may endanger my source.

I will lay low, expect not to hear from me for a few days,

Rob Badgers

Photos intercepted by rival news organisation in transit. No attachment. Anxious that those upstarts in Continental News will nick the story. Please send again.

Ed
PS Typist ‘Angie’ thinks you look dreamy in that mousetash.